As our lives swing back to the normal routines and the CWA year kicks into gear I ponder the challenges I know are ahead and how best to deal with them whilst trying to reign in my imagination regarding things that may or may not eventuate and those over which I have no control. But still I spend time thinking…. what if…..
Jeff always reminds me, when I verbalise my “worst case” thoughts, that we will deal with IT, if IT, happens. But I want to know that I’ve at least tried to avert or prepare for any contingency, be it physical; taking far too many comforts on our trips away to ever be considered a true ‘camper’, or emotional; instantly thinking the worst when the children have been travelling the roads and are late arriving.
One of the reasons I like my wide open spaces is that I can see, smell or hear what’s coming and can attempt some appropriate preparation. Whether it’s a dust storm, cattle being mustered, wheat being harvested or a visitor coming down the front road, I know whether to batten down the hatches, grab the camera, take an antihistamine or run a brush through my hair. The smell and “feel” of rain, dark clouds and distant thunder initiate another battening down session, gathering frightened dogs and distributing strategically placed buckets. The sound of gentle rain on the roof, a huge orange moon materialising from below the eastern horizon or a silver streaked sun setting behind the clouds of the western one herald a moment to pause, reflect and appreciate.
I am inclined to be a “glass half empty” person and if things go right, it’s a bonus. I have a propensity to over-analyse before the event and berate myself afterwards for something not done or said, or that could have been done or said differently. I spend considerable time “day-dreaming” (a trait I inherited from my father) scenarios and what my response/reaction, would/should/could be.
The anomaly in all this lies in the fact that I am also a “last minute Lil” and often achieve more when under pressure and can, on a good day, argue a case without much preparation, or….sometimes…..if I have to……admit defeat, for lack of it.
I’m sure that if I spent time (and one day I might) learning about the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, or similar and complete the exercises to determine my particular personality preferences, it would all be explained and become wonderfully clear. Definitely wouldn’t improve my skills of prediction, but might give me better preparation and coping mechanisms. A thought to tuck away in the dream file….
Perhaps I just accept that Doris Day’s Que Sera Sera is an anthem to live by.